Not Me! Monday

Well it's Monday again. Free therapy day! yay! It's time to confess all the things we didn't do, and stop by MckMama's blog and laugh at all the things everyone else didn't do, too! So let's get started.

I didn't forget that Monday was coming again. I didn't think about it until last night at about midnight, and then say, oh well, I'm too tired, I'll improvise tomorrow. Then I didn't continue to work on pictures and portfolios and such. I value my sleep and never stay up way too late!

I am not at this very moment eating a pop tart and drinking a bottle of water because that is literally all the breakfast food there is in this house. I'm also not eating said pop tart at 12:30 in the afternoon bc my kids stayed at my moms last night and I slept in and just woke up. Uh uh, not me.

I did not SEVERAL times this week bring my children home covered in dirt, sweat, mud, chlorine, and Lord knows what else, saying 'we have to get baths', and then proceed to not bathe them at all. I certainly didn't just let them sleep on the floor to keep such nastiness out of their sheets. On one of those occasions that they were filthy with dirt and mud, I didn't just NOT wash them bc I knew they were going to 'A's' to get in the pool anyhow, and they'd get clean enough there. I didn't bring them home on that occasion, knowing that hadn't been bathed in days with the intention of washing the chlorine out of their hair because we had church in the morning, only to decide that it didn't matter to me at all. They aren't still dirty this glorious Monday.

One day this week while I was trying to get my kids to clean the living room, I did not walk into said living room to find my three year old son, lying on the floor, playing with his trains. I hadn't asked him three hundred times to pick up his trains, and I didn't pop his bottom, tell him to get up or go take a nap, and keep on walking. When I got back to my perch (the spare room bed, these days) he didn't walk into the room, throw his hands in the air, stick his bottom lip out, and yell 'Mommy, you ruined my wife!' And storm out. MY son is neither overly dramatic, nor smart mouthed, and he can pronounce his L's perfectly.

My husband isn't at this moment referring to our son as 'the boy' out loud. He isn't a nerd. I don't adore him.

And in not me Monday fashion, my kids are in the living room screaming at each other and my husband says 'I know I did not hear anyone scream'. Again he isn't a nerd, and he isn't laughing at them, fighting over a pair of shorts my daughter had on her head, and I do not want to run away. Nope.

Earlier this week I didn't bribe my 5 year old daughter with ice cream and a trip to the pool the following day if she would wear her holtor monitor without whining, and run and play hard so the Dr's could see what is *really* going on with her heart. I don't bribe my children. Ever.

We aren't planning on heading outside right now to wash my car and clean the yard knowing full well we are actually going to watch our children wash the car and clean up the yard. We know the child labor laws, and we abide by them strictly :)

At Friday night's graduation I didn't sit behind my Mother and BFF 'S' and add snarky comments about 17 year old girls wearing stripper shoes, and we certainly didn't text jokes back and forth to each other. At the end of graduation my mother and I didn't walk around like Clint and Stacy from 'What Not To Wear' critiquing what everyone had on, and not really trying to hide it. We are polite, respectful people. That being said, it was a graduation, people. Have some respect, dress accordingly. And, some people just really shouldn't wear spandex. And I mean that.

I didn't run around like a chicken with my head cut off yesterday getting pictures of all my friends for my website. Engagement pictures of married friends, senior pictures of kids who are only juniors in high school. That's false advertising. No, not really I just LOVE taking pictures.

Okay, I really have to go watch the kids wash the car :) And I need to, umm, take care of some business first.

*Update* I most certainly did not just go outside in the 95 degree heat and wash both cars, empty, clean and start to refill the swimming pool, prune and water my flowers, and generally get filthy. The grass was growing up around my flowers bc my husband doesn't have string for the weedeater, so I most certainly did not sit there on the ground with a pair of kitchen scissors and cut away the grass that was stealing the sunshine from my flowers. That would be lazy. I also am not sporting the sexiest flip flop tan lines you have ever seen. Uh uh. Not me:-)

I am not now sad bc my son just spilled my Diet Dew on the floor. I don't overload on caffiene knowing it'll make my heart beat too fast, and I didn't seriously just think 'what a waste of soda'.

I also am not dreading cleaning the kitchen. But since my husband and daughter cleaned the living areas I kinda feel obligated. I am also not thinking of random ways to make some quick money so I can work on getting my business going :)
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  • I'm a wife. I'm a mom. I'm a photographer. I'm a lover of Jesus. My house is a mess, my kids are dirty, we eat take out more often than not. My life is loud, busy and crazy. And that's okay with me.
    This is Eric, the man you've been praying for. He's a paramedic. He quilts in his spare time. No, I couldn't make that up :) He has NASH (a form of liver disease, non-alcoholic) and diabetes, but those things don't define him. He's a man of God, an insanely wonderful husband, and the best daddy in the world.. Just ask these guys..
    Our daughter Ali, she's 9. She's fiercely opinionated and strong willed. She's a Daddy's girl, but the umbilical cord hasn't but cut from me, either. She's a gymnast, and proud of it. She spends more time upside down or turning flips than she does walking. She's crazy smart, and absolutely sure of it. She is my insufferable little know it all.
    Our son Dylan, 7. We lovingly refer to him as Chubs. Or Chubby. Or fat boy. Ahem. He is all boy, as you can see by his crazy wild energy. He has the highest pain tolerance of any child I have ever met. He plays soccer and does gymnastics, but truly he is a gamer, a nerd. He is an avid reader and loves to climb. Not to be outdone by his sister, he's a drama king, but to him, I'm the best mommy in the world.