The End.
Courtney
My heart is pounding. I am literally writing this post because I am at home alone with three children and there is anger seeping out of my pores. I can not see straight. I am breathing heavily and I want to scream. I do not know that I have ever been this angry. In the last few years, I have gone through so many phases of this journey. I was so lost, consumed with depression and suicidal ideologies. I was wracked with grief and consumed with guilt.

But now, I feel no grief. I feel no sorrow or fear.

I feel only anger.

Be angry and sin not.

God, I promise I am trying.

I want to scream. I want to shatter something with a baseball bat. My head is going to explode. I do not feel like a victim today. Today, I feel like the rest of the world has lost their minds, and I am strong, and I am walking away. Today, I feel the least like a victim I've ever felt. I do not feel powerless. I know the ripples of my actions will be great. But I know that things can not continue in the path they are headed. And so, tonight, my world changes. Again. Only this time, it's my choice.
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